Diana Baumrind’s breakthrough
In 1966, developmental psychologist Diana Baumrind published a study that named three parenting styles: authoritarian, authoritative, and permissive. Based at the University of California, Berkeley, Baumrind argued that these styles shape family dynamics: who makes decisions, where boundaries sit, and how much control parents exercise. Her findings suggested that a family’s approach to parenting could leave a long-term mark on individual children and on broader social norms.
What parenting looked like in the 1960s
The cultural backdrop of the 1960s influenced how children were raised. Talking about feelings or seeking emotional reassurance was often discouraged, with phrases such as “stop crying, go outside, and figure it out.” Many parents were shaped by the experiences of World War II veterans and viewed toughness and self-reliance as necessary. For example, the narrator’s father, who grew up in a working-class family outside Manchester, handled his own problems without adult help, typical of the hands-off approach common then.
What today’s research shows
Research since then has examined how the era’s practices affected children. Psychologist Peter Gray of Boston College points out that children now have far less unsupervised play and independent time than in the 1960s. He links that decline to lower resilience and rising anxiety and depression among young people. Gray argues that free play taught children important life skills, and he says “the first real emotional storms don’t arrive until eighteen instead of eight,” meaning emotional challenges are happening later for today’s youth.
Psychologist Jean Twenge reviewed decades of data on the “locus of control” (whether people see life outcomes as controlled by themselves or by outside forces) from 1960 to 2002. She found a noticeable shift toward external control: by 2002, the average young person was more externally oriented than eighty percent of their counterparts in the 1960s. Twenge links this shift to higher rates of depression and anxiety and connects it to parental involvement styles and young people’s mental health.
The unexpected upside of 1960s hardships
One thing the 1960s unintentionally taught children was “distress tolerance” (the ability to sit with uncomfortable feelings or situations without immediate relief), contributing to their emotional resilience. Everyday routines such as walking to school alone, settling disputes with peers without adults stepping in, and waiting for a favorite TV show gave children practice handling small stresses. Those manageable challenges helped build resilience, not as an inborn trait but as a skill learned through repeated exposure.
Thinking about parenting today
The 1960s offer a reminder that letting children fail at small things and work through minor conflicts on their own has benefits. That era was not perfect, but its unintended lessons about toughness and emotional training remain relevant. Today’s tendency to overprotect can sometimes prevent children from learning independence and emotional strength.
As society continues to change, finding the right mix of guidance and freedom becomes more important. The work of these researchers offers perspectives while also showing how complicated raising resilient, independent people can be. Parenting involves learning from the past and adjusting to the present.
